Food for the Soul:
The Prophet Elijah: Keeping Faith in Troubled Times

A life with God is one of the richest blessings. We can find comfort in our times of sadness, have our joy multiplied when we rejoice, and discover shelter from the storms of our everyday life. However, a life with God is not a guarantee for a life free from trials and tribulations. Even as believing Christians, we must endure suffering as a part of our life.

You might say to yourself, "Why would God let me suffer?" We're often told that just because we suffer does not mean that there is no God or that God doesn't care. So then how can a loving God let us experience pain or affliction? The fact is that God loves us so much that we can't even begin to imagine it. He does not want suffering for us, but we are the ones who created our own suffering through sin. Suffering entered into the world with Adam and Eve, and we continue to choose sin and suffering for our human race today. Through baptism, through prayer, through communion, and through being with God we are made whole again and restored. Some of the great martyrs went to their deaths with joy on their faces, though they were in great pain, because God gave them His Peace and they accepted it!. When we are with God, there is no physical pain or mental anguish that we could fail to endure with joy. If we choose God, we choose joy over all the sadness and misery this world can muster.

Elijah, whom we commemorate on July 20th, was very faithful and endured until the end. He had strong faith in God, and even after years of hardship he still believed and continued to pray that God would answer his prayers and come to his rescue. God found his faith so pleasing that Elijah was taken to heaven in a fiery chariot.

"My brethren, take the prophets, who spoke in the name of the Lord, as an example of suffering and patience. Indeed we count them blessed who endure. You have heard of the perseverance of Job and seen the end intended by the Lord - that the Lord is very compassionate and merciful. But above all, my brethren, do not swear, either by heaven or by earth or with any other oath. But let your 'Yes' be 'Yes,' and your 'No,' 'No' lest you fall into judgment. Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing psalms. Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let him pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer of faith will save the sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much. Elijah was a man with a nature like ours, and he prayed earnestly that it would rain; and it did not rain on the land for three years and six months. And he prayed again, and the heaven gave rain, and the earth produced its fruit." (James 5:10-20)

We must learn from the lesson of Elijah and not believe that God has forsaken us just because we are experiencing times of suffering or hardships. Our sufferings allow us to grow. We learn from them and they shape us into the children of God we are to become.

Some things to think about:

• Do you believe that anything good can come from suffering?
• Why is it important for us to endure and not give up on faith, even in troubled times?
• How do Orthodox Christians view suffering?
• How do we endure in the faith? As Orthodox Christians, what can we do in troubled times to help us in our struggles?

Kontakion

Prophet Elijah of great renown,
Seer of the mighty works of God
By your command you held back the rain!
Pray for us to the only Lover of mankind!

An Orthodox Look
Books: When Dreams Come True

Eric and Leslie Ludy's book, When Dreams Come True, is the couple's real life love story. The book is broken into three sections: "The Search,""The Friendship," and "The Love Story.""The Search" describes the couple's years in junior high and high school and the search for God. "The Friendship" tells of how they met, and "The Love Story" describes their dating relationship, engagement, and marriage. The chapters alternate between Eric's story and Leslie's story, and we are able to see each person's perspective as the two stories spin into one.

On the upside:

• The book encourages and promotes purity in relationships.
• It reminds us that God needs to be central in our life at all times.
• It is a wonderful example of how great things can happen when we put our trust in God and surrender to His will.

On the downside:

• It will appeal more to the romantic nature of women than it probably will to men, but remains a fantastic real life story about love to which everyone can relate.
• The book lacks much of the Orthodox Christian understanding of the spiritual struggles that accompany dating and relationships: for example, the place of spiritual disciplines such as confession, preparation to receive the Eucharist, etc.
• At times the book comes across almost a bit too fairytale-like and may not relate to many people's experiences of dating and relationships.

On the Whole:

In today's world where there is often little or no thought given to chastity and purity, this couple's story may seem unrealistic and even prudish to some - they even waited to kiss until their wedding day. Even in Christian circles, there is the constant question of how far should limits be pushed. Eric and Leslie's answer about purity in relationships is that God's ways are better than our own. They are "bigger, brighter, bolder, and a million times more beautiful. Our own dreams formed within our little mortal minds may seem romantic and surreal. But the dreams of our God that are formed within His eternal all-loving, almighty mind are far beyond anything we could ever imagine." They learned that things far beyond their wildest dreams are possible when we give our whole life over to His Will. This inspiring story has the potential to completely change the way we think about dating and, at the least, will challenge its readers to take their relationships to a new level.

*** When Dreams Come True, Eric and Leslie Ludy, Loyal Publishing Inc. Sisters, OR, 2000 ***

In the News: The New Face of Christian Rock

The feature article "Rock of ages: Christian bands cross over" appeared in the June 12th edition of the New York Times, describing the unique circumstance modern Christian rock artists face. It also described the steps they are taking to get their music into the mainstream and become attractive to audiences that often reject Christian bands, sound unheard. Putting aside all stereotypes about these artists, the author wrote that they are "making original, high-quality music and attracting fans for their sound, not their message." However, while these musicians are finding themselves with the possibility to expand their fan base by the high quality of their music, they run the risk of alienating their original supporters in the process.

The article reveals a common message the crossover bands share - a differentiation between a Christian Band and a band made up of Christians. "We are not a Christian band… But we are Christians" said Joey Milligan from Anberlin, a band that is closely associated with Christian rock but never claims to be a Christian band. All of the members describe themselves as Christian but do not associate their band or even their music with Christianity. It seems as if for the first time in this genre's history, there is a public separation between the musician and his or her music. "The genre is divided between a more traditional, contemporary-pop sound intended only for a Christian audience and a more underground, independent, non-preachy music, which has a better shot at breaking into the rock mainstream."

However, one wonders if the term "Christian" is being taken advantage of to further the popularity of a band in order to springboard them into the top of the Billboard 100. The article discusses the band's stage time at Christian youth groups and churches, venues that do not book contemporary bands and to which cautious parents may be more prone to permitting their child to attend. By picking and choosing certain venues, are they demonstrating their versatility or simply using the fact that they are Christian to further their career?
One thing is clear: the musicians and their record labels share the understanding that music is indeed a business. John Tunell, co-owner of the Dreamworld Music Complex in Arlington Texas states, "I'm a Christian business owner, but this is a business, not a ministry."
The Christian community will determine what is acceptable behavior for the portrayal of Christian ideals. Readers are, however, left with a clear resounding echo in their minds: that the Christian rock of today is much different than what first appeared on the scene in the 1980s. Its ultimate success, if recent trends continue, will not only be determined by the musicians' ability to make good music, but also by the band's ability to balance its personal beliefs with its business model.

On the Calendar:

All Orthodox Young Adults Invited to FOCA Convention - Williamsburg, VA: August 28 - September 1, 2003

Williamsburg, VA - The Fellowship of Orthodox Christians in America (FOCA), together with the Orthodox Church in America's (OCA) Department of Youth, Young Adult, and Campus Ministry, invites you, the Young Adults, to the annual FOCA National Convention. This year's convention will be held in Colonial Williamsburg, VA during Labor Day weekend, August 28 - September 1, 2003.
Activities include:

• Young Adult breakout session on Friday morning, which will be combined with Convention Planning; the results of which will be discussed Saturday morning.
• Young Adult Reception on Friday night starting at 10:00 PM.
• Young Adult session titled "Focus - Young Adults in the FOCA and the Church" on Saturday from 2:00 - 3:00 PM. Both the OCA and the FOCA will be well represented in this session.
• Vespers on Saturday at 4:00 PM.
• A Young Adult outing/barbeque at Busch Gardens Amusement Park on Saturday evening.
• An informal volleyball tournament on Sunday afternoon.
• Hierarchal Divine Liturgy on Sunday morning.
• Grand Banquet and Ball on Sunday evening at the Williamsburg Lodge.

For more information go to the press release.
If you have questions or would like more information, please contact Lara Herzak at lherzak@yahoo.com or visit the 2003 FOCA Convention web site at http://www.williamsburg2003.org or the FOCA website at http://www.orthodoxfellowship.org.

Love and Dating: Is Kissing Okay?

Question:

Is it OK to kiss someone that you just started dating? How about once you've been seeing each other for awhile? I mean, how do you know when it is the right time for kissing…or for anything? I don't want to rush things, but how do you know that you've gone too far?

Answer:

A kiss can be taken as a greeting, a sign of peace, and an expression of love. In the Church we greet each other with the kiss of peace. Kisses in and of themselves can be wonderful expressions of love. In the beginning stages of dating someone, it is better to concentrate on getting to know that person without physical affection, but as your relationship grows and you seek God's guidance for the relationship, you will know if and when it is right to express affection with a kiss. Kisses upon greeting or parting, if they are expressions of innocent affection, are appropriate if you are comfortable with this and if you can be alert to keeping things at this level.

However, there is a difference between affection, such as kisses and hugs, and those physical actions-heavy or sensual kissing, etc.-that are meant to arouse. Arousal is meant to be a prelude for relations blessed within marriage. It is a wonderful thing, but is special and unique to the sacrament of marriage. If we understand our physical desires and know the teachings of the Church, we can exercise self-control and preserve our Christian standards.

Stop yourself when you know things are becoming too heated. The fact that you may feel that you are doing the wrong thing usually is a warning sign that you are. Your heart and mind are trying to tell you the right thing to do. Do not be afraid to let anyone know that you are uncomfortable with a certain level of intimacy. It takes courage and strength to put up a stop sign, but you will be stronger for it in so many ways - mentally, emotionally and spiritually. In practicing self-control, you will be better able to figure out what God has in store for you by following His will. "For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you should know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in passion of lust, like the Gentiles who do not know God" (1 Thessalonians 4:3-5).

Remember to keep your sensibility intact and stick to your gut feeling. Pray about it. Make mental notes about how you will handle situations and what is comfortable and right for you. Keep a caring base of friends who share the same faith, may talk with you, and understand what you are experiencing. If you are dating another Christian, this can create a very "positive peer pressure" to follow the teachings of our Church.

If you truly believe that we are all made in the image and likeness of God then you will be strong to uphold this respect for your own body and others. Relationships grow with the intimacy of sharing your thoughts and feelings. When your relationship grows strong in this manner, both hearts and minds are joined and you will know what is right. Take things slowly with care and patience, and ultimately, love.

"I appeal to you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that you may prove what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect"
(Romans 12, 1-2).

This is your place to ask questions on love and dating and get an Orthodox perspective. E-mail your questions to youth@oca.org and put "Love and Dating" in the subject line. We'll answer your question directly and then post it later in an upcoming issue. Don't worry. All submissions will be treated anonymously.

Real Questions/Real Answers:
Bowing in Martial Arts

Question:

I'm considering taking a traditional Japanese martial arts class, since it isn't always very safe in Brooklyn. I sat in on a class and noticed something on the wall that looked like a small model building of some sort. It was later described as a Shinto shrine representing the martial arts school, also known as the dojo. As part of dojo etiquette, a student first entering must bow to the shrine as a show of respect. The student must then bow to the teacher then to his or her fellow students in the same way. As you may already know, in Japanese custom a bow is the equivalent of a handshake. Other than that, no religious instruction is given, only self-defense.

My question is, can I continue to take this martial arts class without having any conflicts with my faith?

Answer:

The kind of bowing you refer to--bowing to the martial arts school and to your fellow classmates and instructor--is just as you described it: a show of respect. However, you are right to be careful about actions like this. Even though you know that your bow has no religious meaning to you, if the circumstances are such that other people may misconstrue it as a show of faith or devotion to an idol, you should avoid it. As living witnesses to the one true Faith, we should always be mindful that our actions carry great weight and should always be pointing others only to Christ. If you understand in your heart that you are bowing only to show respect, and you are certain that the entire class understands the bowing to be a ritual of respect and not of faith, then there is no conflict with your Christian faith. In situations like this, it is best to pray about the activity; God will usually let you know right away if what you're doing isn't pleasing to Him. If it is, then we wish you the best in your study of self-defense and urge you to be safe. But don't forget, the most powerful weapons against evil will never be your fists, they will always be prayer and faith.

Readers Write:

Don't forget!
We know you have great stories to tell, and honest opinions to share. We know amazing things have happened to you and you were just wondering, "Now, HOW can I share this with others?" Well, the section IS entitled "Readers Write," so what better venue than right here?

You're a reader, so…. You know the next step. Send us something you've written and would like to see in a future issue of YO-Mail. Commentary on YO-Mail is welcome, as is anything that is pertinent to our lives as Christians. Send it in to yomail@oca.org and we will put it here.